Tuesday, May 7, 2013
As a registered sex offender, you've got your own cheering squad - the only problem is, they're not cheering for you to succeed. Everyone is looking over your shoulder, just waiting for you to fail, so they can hold you up to the media as the perfect example of just why sex offender laws need to be so tough.
It doesn't get easier if you don't fail, though. They just keep looking over your shoulder, looking for that one little flaw. And if you don't present one, if you do everything just right, then your reward is rejections for employment, reminders of just how badly you screwed up, and further isolation and exclusion.
This is the daily grind for a registered sex offender. It's a never ending cycle that you can't get away from.
I admit that I've felt like giving up. Cashing it all in. Dancing at the end of a rope, going to sleep in my car in the garage, or practicing my swan dive off of a bridge somewhere. Today was one of those days. Then I looked into the eyes of my wife, and saw the love and adoration in her face. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones, because while I have a chorus line rooting against me, they just can't compete with the one person who means the world to me.
And that gives me the strength to go back out there for another round.